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New York Signs a ‘Giant’ Replacement for Plaxico Burress (Satire)

Published by on June 14, 2009
Article Source: Bleacher Report - NFL

Just days after failing to lure the Sears Tower from Chicago to replace troubled 9'6" wide receiver Plaxico Burress, the Giants scored big by signing the Empire State Building to snag Eli Manning's blimp-like passes.

The Sears Tower scoffed at NFL Network analyst Adam Schefter's claim that he wasn't ready for the bright lights of the city that never sleeps.

"That pompous ass Schefter doesn't know what he's talking about. I'm from Chicago, player. My stats man...Even I can't get up high enough to get those wounded ducks Manning chucks. Who do I look like, Plaxico Burress?"

The Empire State Building wasted no time letting anybody with in ear shot know that he is up for the challenge. 

"Yo God...

Read Complete Article at Bleacher Report - NFL
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